Hell of the North

Like last years ride, the North Cheshire Clarion held a tribute ride to the Paris-Roubaix event that is held every year.  Again we rode along cobbles, rough tracks and around the lanes of North Cheshire.  I'm not going to go into detail about the actual route because you can read about it here.  However suffice to say it was excellent.  Great riding and great cake at the Lavender barn.

En`Masse

20 odd riders turned up, some on cross bikes, some on mountain bikes and the rest on expensive road bikes.  The route was the same as 2011 and was just as rough and hard as before.  The weather was pretty good as well.

Maniacs

As with all good things there is a balance of bad and in the case of the L`Enfur du Nord (Hell of the North) ride it was the motorists that we encountered.  Today it appeared that every homicidal, sociopathic psychotic wank basket were behind the wheel and roaming the roads of Warrington, all  hell bent on either killing a cyclist or attempting to fight with one.

The InnerSanctum of Cake

On our approach to Lumb Brook road I took primary position just before I entered the Tunnel. Then, from behind I could hear a car speed up, its engine screaming and then, as I entered the tunnel, this purple battered Mondeo actually attempted to overtake me.  He ran out of road very quickly and skidded, missing me by inches. I stopped, unclipped and let rip with anger and bile to which came the reply "You idiot".  There is just no reasoning with people like this..Tosser number one.

Secondly we had an incident with a Citroen Saxo driver who overtook us very closely, then proceeded to mouth of to us in some neanderthal gibberish, and then chase us up Stockton Lane - up until the gate that is- asking for a fight.  Nick waved to him as we left him behind, fuming.  However we did think he might end up searching for us.

The obligatory "Money Shot"

The ride proceeded with more and more bad overtakes and shouts of "You should be riding single file"..etc..etc..etc.  A family of chavs in a badly maintained skoda overtook us, an arm emerged out of the cabin, ciggie in the finger and the arm covered in faded Tattoos.





"Single file.........." the unemployed twat shouted at us.  He sped off with his ugly family all peering at us through the nicotene stained rear window.

Cake and Cameras

We got the Lavender barn after 25 miles and ate cake - A loveley slice of victoria sponge - and then left ,  encountering more fuck heads along the way. Today was the day of atrocious driving and lack of patience.   I also decided that I would be purchasing a helmet camera.  After the threatening nature of the drivers we encounted today I think recording these events would be "advantageous".

Pure Filth

I extended my ride somewhat by riding to Daresbury.  I'd left my car there overnight - thanks to a curry night in Frodsham to which I was paying for this morning - so a few extra miles were added.  By this time all of the idiots on the road were gone, replaced by well mannered drivers.

Tomorrow is another northern ride, up to Ecclestone Delph Dive centre.  After scuba diving there it will be nice to see the place again and witness the fatties in their drysuits. If the weather is good I'll be joining the NCC ... That's if I manage to uncake my bike and remove the mantle of shit that's now covering it.


Here are my riding stats today